The “Journey Down The Aisle” essentially has allowed you all to read about Emily and my individual stories with the loves of our lives. It has truly been a privilege to share this with everyone. And yes, it has been a journey to remember.
Everything leading up to my wedding day seems to have come from a movie. There were last minute changes to significant parts of the ceremony and reception, a wild camping trip with the bachelors, days with almost zero sleep, and countless phone calls to either answer questions or ask them myself.
The big day started after a short, deep sleep. The sun was shining and the grass was green. The morning seemed unusually quiet and peaceful, but my task-oriented mind still reeled on with lists of things to do. I took a few minutes to calibrate by reading scripture, but then realized I had no coffee. So I scuttled out the door to stop by the nearest oasis of caffeine before arriving to the venue to tie up details.
Details.
And more details.
The wedding day had so many details to tend to. I thankfully had the help of family members, friends and my groomsmen. Most of the details were tended to without me noticing. I was so caught up in completing the seemingly unending tasks, that I forgot about all the help before me.
Paying attention to details is not a strength that comes naturally to me, so it took nearly all of my effort to do so, which may have resulted in inadvertent negligence to the help I had. But there was one detail that I wanted to be perfect–my vows.
Earlier in the wedding planning process, I decided to write a song for my vows to Caitlin. I had hardly spent much time in my life thinking about what my vows would say to my one-day wife, but a song seemed to be perfect. Caitlin always dreamed of having a musical wedding. She has a degree in vocal performance and plays multiple instruments. Needless to say, I wanted to perfect this one element of the ceremony.
I know the lyrics are sincere because they challenge me. They seem to hold me accountable. Allow me to explain.
In the song I promise to love her through the “late nights, diseases, poopy diapers and sneezes–laundry and dishes and burnt food and gardening.” All of that and “school and car loans that just keep us in debt, is all one big adventure that we’ll never regret.” Those words kept ringing through my mind the day of my wedding, as a reminder that those details for this one day ultimately do not matter to the bigger picture: we’re getting married!
The only detail that mattered was whether or not our officiant signed the marriage license that day. (Which he did.)
Many details were ultimately overlooked. Like the coffee cup that my Best Man graciously bought for me earlier in the day that I, or someone, left on the steps of the stage we were married on. Or, the runner that my bride was supposed to walk on that was left on the same steps of the same stage. And the tiki torches- turns out they work better when lit- (they eventually were). Oh and having someone to direct traffic is a must. The list could go on … Most of those little details were taken care of by friends and the wedding coordinator–who were both significant headache reducers.
But seeing my beautiful bride for the first time that day with her gleaming eyes and flowing gown narrowed my vision down to a tunnel; her eyes sucked me in and the torrent of noise became a calm stream. The details became floating specks of unnoticed dust. I smiled and eagerly waited as she walked down the runnerless aisle with her eyes on me.
And then reality began to sink in. That was Caitlin’s last walk with her father as a single woman. Soon she and I would become a permanent team; we would become one, and the adventure of tag-teaming life would soon begin.
Details are important. But not when they distract us from noticing the “sunset moments” in life. (As put by my Best Man during his toast.) Seeing her walk down the aisle was a sunset moment. However, the truth is that the whole process of getting married is beautiful, not just that specific moment on the wedding day. Perhaps this was my greatest lesson through it all, pay the most attention to the bigger picture. The details will work themselves out, and if they don’t, then they probably weren’t that important to begin with.
This principle actually reminds me of, in my opinion, the most challenging verse in the Bible. In Matthew 6:33 Jesus says “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” My understanding of that verse makes me think, “all these things,” are the details of life, and the bigger picture is “his kingdom.”
Caitlin and I were so blessed by the wedding day, more than we even imagined. We have begun to thank the many people in our lives who helped put it together, but we have long way to go yet. If you’re reading this, and you were involved with our wedding in any way, even if you supported us by being there, thank you. You are a blessing.
