Life feels so noisy right now. There is a lot to be worked up about, so many decisions that need to be made, so many heartaches to mourn, so many injustices that need righted. Amidst it all, we have to carry on with our daily lives and keep it all together.
It seems like everyone I know, myself included, has leaned harder into our vices over this year. We’re all seeking comfort as we try to process it all. Sometimes we seek comfort in things that are healthy and helpful to us, like a good book or a close relationship. Sometimes we seek comfort in things that anesthetize the situation, like alcohol, food, social media or more destructive behaviors that give us a break from feeling for awhile.
Self-comfort can provide a helpful break from the stress, but self-comforting behaviors can easily become habitual or addictive, because they don’t give us what we really need. Self-care is sometimes defined as “parenting ourselves.” I love that definition because as a parent, I’m always thinking about what my children need, not just what they want. They need rest, they want to stay up late. They need nutrition, they want to eat candy.
Like most of us, I have recognized patterns of unhealthy self-comfort emerging in my life this year. Self-care can be an antidote for these patterns, because self-care gives us the opportunity to address the problem, not just the symptoms we’re wrestling with.
One way I care for myself is to counteract the noise with quiet. I am prone to seeking stimulation, so removing myself from the action and retreating into nature is the first step to finding peace. I set aside my screens, open my eyes to the beautiful world we live in, get quiet and simply listen.
I found myself at Charles Mill State Park, overwhelmed by the incredible amount of beauty just minutes from my home, and wondering why I don’t find myself there more frequently. Birds of all kinds were showing off amidst the golden autumn morning as the trees inhaled before they burst into a firescape of oranges and reds.
Colleen Cook works full-time as the Director of Operations at Vinyl Marketing in Ashland, where she resides with her husband Mike and three young daughters. She’s an insatiable extrovert who enjoys finding reasons to gather people.
Minutes after I sat down, I felt a flurry of emotion. I let it wash over me as I sat there with curiosity about what had been waiting for me under the surface, waiting for space to process. I pulled out my journal and unloaded my heart onto its pages, giving myself full permission to write it all, holding nothing back.
As my heart bled onto the pages of my journal as a prayer, I felt the freedom of release. Peace washed over me and I began to dream and think about the years to come. When I was free from my anxieties and shame, I was free to ask myself what it was I really wanted and give myself permission to dream about what that might look like, how I might get there. In the quiet, I was able to see the size of the things that had been distracting me from the bigger, truer things. I was able to orient myself in a direction that aligned with the desires of my heart.
It can be so tempting to numb it all, to drown out all the noise and to lean into the things that soothe us in this stressful time. But, carve out time to give your spirit a chance to breathe, to weep, to speak. Your mind will feel clearer, your heart will feel lighter and you won’t need those vices the way you did before.
